My soul was brought down here in this body and its trying to find it's worth
The world is so full of walls that I can't even see
But I walk forward and I hit a glass door before me every direction I take
How do we know
Our souls price tag
How can we see what is real and what is genuine
When everyone around wears masks
Plastic faces
And wigs
I'm not knocking the religious people I'm just trying to find what is real
I would like to know what I'm worth
What I deserve and whether I'm worthy of ascension
I try to find my footing but the world around me is so plastic I don't know where i stand
I want to feel the things I used to feel
When you touch me I want To know that I want you from the deepest of my being
I want to know things
I want to be sure so deep in my head
When did I start to question everything?
When did I start to resent my conclusions and doubt my mind
I want to roam free in this world the same way that I used to
Can my soul be free once again?
Can I roam this earth as me and not as a mollusk waiting to shed her skin
Doubt is a disgusting horrible feeling
An energy
I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy
It is the murderer or all life
I wish to see clearly again
I want my footing back
I want to be my own friend again
Friends til the end i want
To love myself
Freely
Deeply and fully
My home is where my heart is
I want to dance in the streets and sing and yawn all at the same time
I want you to see me and see the glitter in my eye
I want my youth back
I am dying so quickly
But I shouldn't be
I should be waking up eager to live my life because
My life is at it's peek
In some ways
And in others
It's broken
A broken winged bird in the words of Robert frost
I let too many people push me around and now
I'm on the ground, looking up and no one
Takes my hand
But you
You are generous with your love and always have been
You have wrapped your generous heart around me and saved me endless times. Does that make you my savior?
Or me yours ?
I hope I have done the same for you
Would be better to return the favor
On those nights when i lie awake and you
Are plastered to my soul
Like wall paper
The kind with the tiny dancing ballerinas
You are part of me
It's beyond love at this point
It's a transcended element
Beyond time
Beyond space
It makes so sense and we ask ourselves
So clearly
We are adults after all
But we can't seem to make up our minds
But why
Why can't we make a choice? Yes or no?
Is this eternal or temporary
The age old question
Is it disposable like paper plates, or is it like Tiffanys china that your treasure and pass on to your kids
Do I want to rip open my ribs and give you all the colors of my soul?
You have seen them clearly, but I have not given them to you fully
And I think you know that
Intuitively
Your heart is mine and my heart is yours?
can we rip this apart?
Is this our fate?
Is this our destiny ?
I'm dying to know
The choice.
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